Things that make me happy

Found a page in my note book with a scribbled list of "things that make me happy" in green ink. Im certain I wrote this drunk. I'm a philosopher after my second glass.. In no particular order

Dance

Music

Exercise

Chicken

Falafel

Public speaking

Pictures

Social media

The news

Sleep

Jackson

Marijuanna 

Crying

Success

Making out

Goal setting 

Goal reaching

Starbucks

Free wifi

The colour purple

Funny people

Chocolate

Boys

Good looking boys

Pizza

Attention

Compliments

Gossip

Performing

Makeup

Showering 

Losing weight 

DIVAS

Swimming

Toronto 

blue jays

Dance parties in my room

Cosmo

Money

Eye lashes

Compliments

Writing

Pretending to be drake

Dressing up

Shopping

Sunshine

Pineapples

Stretching

Drinking

I didn't write family or friends.. Which I find really bazarre.. There were a few other things but I kept it pg 13 for my people.

Later dayyyzzzzzzz

Update

That awkward moment when you realize the post you wrote last week is missing.. I typed up a pretty damn long update.. Basically summed up October. I was planning on sending it to my fam jam. That didn't happen. Ya. Awkward. And I really don't feel like re writing it buuuuuuut I have a crap load of free time ATM so why nat..

How does wind work? Like, where does the movement start? I don't get it. Speaking of ATM I've paid off my OSAP! Just in time for my 19th birthday (tomorrow). You know what they say... Ain't nothing like paying off a student loan before your legal bday!!!!!! Nobody says that. Is it odd that I hope you're reading this thinking wtf is she drunk which is the perfect Segway for no because I'm not drinking for the rest of my contract!!!!!! .....Slay...... I've almost completely entirely gone insane. I'm proud of myself :) hopefully that explains why I am not excited to see the hunger games sequel and equally unexcited, not sure where I'm going with this. But I do know that I don't know where my doughnut is. *funnel bump*

And that's October in a nutshell

To be continued

3516

I probably have too much fun decorating the white board outside of my cabin. I bought a boat load of colours to play with which in my opinion has been one of my best investments yet.

If my daily "ah ha!" moments don't end up here, twitter or coming out of my mouth (most likely), then you'll find 'em on ma board. Play on words, crazy fonts, fav quotes, new ways to write "Morgan's cabin", things to draw, patterns, designs.. If this playlist job falls through the cracks I seriously think I have a future in white board design no I don't but moving on yeah over it

HAUS of MorGAGA

We'll.. To be honest it's usually just lady gaga quotes or stupid things like "divas tonight!!!!!!!" 

What ever

Hop off

Xx

I, feel good

ARTPOP is out. 

Let the creativity flow.

I'm not implying this album is at all simple but the phrase "enjoy life's simple pleasures" is relevant in my life right now. New gaga streaming on repeat as I spit out choreo on the breezeway. 

A piece of me I established back home working as a choreographer has come to cruise. This sense of selflessness is a pleasure beyond pizza and peanut m&ms combined. 

And for those who have heard the track, that's what ARTPOP means to me.

I'm focused.

What is up people

Literally had 5 or 6 people come up to me last night saying they read my blog. Hi y'all! And this whole time I thought my posts were going unread. Pretty soon I'm gonna start sub blogging about my co workers and post bios and stuff. But that would be really immature and irresponsible and I'm not gonna say anymore because I might regret it later ;) 

Ha 

#inadrunkenstupor

Ok Toronto 

We need to have a chat

Other then our mayor being on crack, what is gwanin???

Seems like my world is on pause but everything and everyone else is on fast forward. Oh, The shanagains I could be getting into back home right now. From gypsy nights to Halloween regrets.. To binging on turkey what the hell I'm missing thanksgiving and Christmas.. The only times a year we have turkey

K

..

LIIIIIIIIIIIKKKKKE

I must say though, when I get home, although I'll be legAl, I'm not sure if I'll be drinking a whole lot. The novelty of being able to drink underage was probably more satisfying then actually getting drunk. And I'm drunk literally 5 times a week here. AND it's dirt cheap here unlike home where I'll probably be paying more money on one night then I do for a week here. A bottle of Pinot Grigio is $7. Ya. A glass at the bar is $7.50. Plus I've made enough memories that I don't remember for a life time. I'm wild. Pulling some next Rob Ford shie up in here. 

But I'm putting this in writing and I hope some of my coworkers see this.. I'm not gonna drink next cruise. All 7 days. Lol. And I was gonna try doing no pizza but IM SO WEAK. I'll try though..

Alright sober for a cruise. Break on 3. 

1

2

3

Break

I'm already drunk .. . .

Cp what

Nothing better then a blast from the past. Found my Cawthra park sweater in my drawer today and just had to put it on, which naturally, led to past blasting. 

There's a lot I can say about this sweater. Probably too much for a sweater. 

If you were a rap student at cp, these sweaters didn't seem like much of an option. Maybe not week one because everyone was wearing there new back to school outfits (miss those), but the shocking amount of people in these awkwardly large navy blue hoodies with " CAWTHRA" on the front and the persons major on the back. I'm pretty sure the most popular topic of conversation in gr 9 was when can we order a sweater, until the order forms for the sweaters came out. 

So we order the sweaters, wear them religiously till the novelty and navy blue fades enough for our topic of conversation switch over to the caf cookies and the struggle of waiting till Friday to have poutine. Winners. That's what we were. 

But in all seriousness, it wasn't bout the sweaters. It was about your major. I remember going out of my way to see someone's back which led to judgement and assumptions almost always before I met them. 

Now that high school literally means nothing in my current life and I'm having so much fun reminiscing, let's address stereotypes. Oh lord okokok 

We had our crazy ass drama majors who usually only associated with each other or the occasional music major. I personally thought they were the best department in the school simply because they were so passionate about the school. They had great personalities and confidence which at the end of the day is more important then how high you can kick your leg, belt or what ever is considered impressive for visual artists. Speaking of art majors.. Where were they and where are they now. Maybe they were hiding from all of us performing artists. I don't blame them. Maybe they were just bitter because "visual arts" was too long for the back of the sweater and "art" kinda looked stupid. Without those sweaters or a obnoxious personality you didn't really get noticed in cp. real talks, I didn't have any VA friends. But I did have music major friends. They were probably to most... Normal. But not really because no one was normal at Cawthra. Hahahahahahahahahaha normal in Cawthra. NOPE. Our music dept was so talented. Get it y'all. And then there were the dance majors. The girls. We ran the world. We definitely got the most attention. Makes sense though, the artistic director of our entire rap program was a dance teacher. And we were hot so

This has been fun. Being on a ship can really mess with you.. Sometimes it's good to drop the ego and remind yourself of how pathetic you used to be, laugh, then go about being your true self. The self you established when you made most of your first mistakes, high school. Loved Cawthra. 

Cp out

Blogging

It's been a really long time since I've taken the time to type long posts about my life like there's people reading them. Sorry to all the people reading these, I've missed you. I'm not gonna update you on the 10 ish cruises that have past since my last post buuut I do wanna address some things about ship life and talk about where my heads at right now.

First thing I need to get off my chest, I've grown an obsession with pizza. 

I spend a lot of time jamming to gaga and getting dressy and drunk. The good life right. But not really. No. Not at all. I'm on a friggan rocky ass boat. With bad food (except for our za) and slow wifi. We all make the best of things, for the most part, but there's a spectrum of ship life morals that are constantly clashing. Takes a lot to be positive when your co workers aren't.. And vice versa. Sometimes being miserable just feels so good. Whether or not you have company. At the end of the day, no matter how shady things have been, there always cheap drinks and free pizza. Hollllllaaaaaa

Ship life truly is like jersey shore level crazy when it comes to drama. Like Roni and Sammi all day. Honestly don't even have the energy to say anything more about the drama. It's just nuts. 

I have to say I've become a lot more comfortable with being here. Its odd because I have never felt so alone in my life but that seems to be my motivation right now. I'm literally not important to anybody on this ship. No best friends, boyfriend, position of authority, nothing about my place here is irreplaceable. I'm here for myself and myself only. Upsetting, yes, but really self empowering. I'm an 18 year old girl from Canada performing on ship. That's pretty impressive. Go me. Hopefully believing in myself will get easier. Praise The Lord for the good people on this ship though. Seriously, bless the hearts of the people who put up with my bs mood swings and cheer lead my ass out of depression at times. Go YOU. 

And I'm still in love with divas.

Till next time. Keep it real people :*

ARTPOP

I'm ready for you

Cozumel, Mexico. First excursion!

This was my first time getting off the ship in a place other then Mobile, Alabama or New Orleans. It was also the first time stepping foot on land other then the US and my home and native land, Canada. Crazy. Absolutely insane!

The weather was beautiful. Sunny all day, hot but not disgusting. Ideal white girl wether. I was literally outside from 10:30-3:30, so sun burning was inevitable. Bad burns but what everrrrr. Sun screen from here on out.

My day went like this

After meeting with the entertainment dept and stepping foot onto Cozumel, we all got onto a twister raft?! To Isla Pasion, a small island there. This raft was sick. Similar to a ride at an amusement park but with ocean salt water flying everywhere. Of course we saw a ship wrecked raft on our way over #comforting

So we get to the island.

OMG.

Stunning.

Likkkkeeeeeeeeeee perfect.

We hit the all inclusive food and drinks immediately... I literally ate around 5 lbs worth of fresh guacamole. Ahhhhhhh.

Chillen in the ocean with my co workers, friends, was really pleasing. Just being able to be. Just focus on existing and not working. 

Then if course I got drunk. Had beer pored over my head, ate fresh coconut, fresh salsa and chips, drank, laughed, good times.

Well that's my first Cozumel adventure in a nut shell.

Latin nights

I didn't get a chance to write my pre post show blogs for Latin nights. Allow me to explain. 

We opened divas on a Tuesday, then Latin on Saturday. We put off learning Latin so we literally learnt the entire show in 3 days. Singing, dancing, costuming, lighting, make up, blocking, quick changes, etcetcetc. I cried in my dorm room almost twice everyday day. The first time we ran the show, I had an anxiety attack and started screaming I wasn't ready. Not the best experience. I was shaken up to say the least. Thinking about the process and the show itself still makes me feel defeated. The day of the show I camped out in my room, rehearsed, cried and did sit-ups after sit-ups because the costume is no no there's no costume. It could be something you picked up last weekend from Victoria secret. 

Thankfully after binging on sweets and pineapples I carved a smile in my face and just went for it.

Habdjoabx bckdiiwyavc

Gah it wasn't good. My mic was dangling an shie. WAH. 

Second show was a blur.. A LOT better but not fantastic. Dancing in the atrium/lobby afterwards was fun though. The guests seemed to think we were royalty. Taking pictures and dancing with us and what not.

I could go on for ever about this day. Man. Latin nights. L a t i n n i g h t s.

Ahhhhhhhhhh

6th cruise!

Now that we've opened all of the shows, I don't wanna say the magics gone, but the opening night, first kiss type of magic is gone. 

The struggle isn't doing the shows anymore, it's performing. We performed them before but 90% of the performance was adrenaline. So with our supervisors and the old cast gone now finding the extra "oomph" to do these shows and do them well can be a tad challenging at times. 

All the positivity I get helps. 

And pineapples. 

They help lots too. 

Divas! Before opening..

This show.

Omg.

This show was tailored to fit me. I am divas. Like listen, 

Lady gaga, Britney Spears, beyonce, Rihanna, Celine dion, Katy perry, prince, Christina aguilera, pink, 

Moulin rouge people. LIKE

It's perfect and I'm too stoked to open it tomorrow. Long ponytail and all. So ready

Callin all divas

The Brits!! Post opening

I've done it peeps

Made it through the cast change and opened my first show. I'm officially the playlist cast on the carnival conquest. Hell. Yes.

We got a standing ovation and I cried and I ponied to death. And I ate like 628491 pineapple chunks. 

The Brits is literally a cardio show. Turbo fire and intensity mashed into a 30 minute show. Who doesn't love a challenge??? And a sweaty wig..

We performed it for the 3rd and 4th time tonight. Man I lie my job. Stressful but so worth it.

Night!

Seeking professional help

Over the course of the past 3 days I have developed an obsession with pineapples that is spiralling out of control. I take it all. Literally no body on this ship, guests included, get even a wiff of pineapple. I think about it the moment I'm awake and through out the day and oh- don't even getting a sister started on my pineapple dreams. Yesterday, a poured a cup of pineapple under my pillow, that way when I wake up from night terrors about a shortage of pineapple or a slice falling on the floor, I'm comforted by the convenience of pineapple; in my bed. Ttyl. Gotta get my fix y'all.

Peace 🍍 

The Brits! Before opening..

Today we ran The Brits today for the first time beginning to end with animation, lighting, vox, costumes, hair makeup, the works! And I must say, I was pleasantly surprised! Obviously I made mistakes, I'm Morgan Stasiewicz, but they weren't major! All fixable, an things that I already knew and forgot to do, or things like pony on your left, not right! WOOO!

But I'm still terrified

Quite a bit

And by quite a bit mean a lot

It's a half an hour show guys. That's not easy. Theres something like 260 ponies. thats a lot of damn ponies. Read my other post for some more seers but its literally a half an hour of cardio and crazy quick changes! Including wigs! 

PS IM A RED HEAD FOR THE SHOW LOL

I'm too lazy to continue writing. That just goes to show just how draining 260 ponies can be. Y'all. 

Good night! 

AHHHHHHHHHHH

Cast quotes!

"Stop drop and roll"

"Y'all"

"I get my pussy wet"

"These Lil mamas gotta be on point"

"Boom boom cah"

"Get it girl"

"Do the things he likes to do"

"Is crumpet British" 

"Are you alright?"

"Lucky"

"Whale watching"

"Guest services.. Get in line"

"I'm ready to partay"

"Don't you know my ass is famous"

"This is actually happening"

"I like you"

What my roommate said to me yesterday. Awesome.

Rehearsals.. The Brits!!!

Got a lot of positive feedback today. Guess things are finally starting to click. I'm liking this. 

But

I'm still rehearsing like a maniac. From 9 am to 7:30 with 2 breaks. 45 mins if we're lucky. That's "chorey", vocals, sound checks, mic run throughs and running all the material; dancing, singing, acting, breathing. 

In one week we'll be opening our first show. 

The Brits.

The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, The Who.. the the the the lots n lots n lots more. The perfect collab between animation on giant LED screens and performers. It's wicked cheesy. And trippy. As an audience member, it's like you're on acid.. Or Lucy in the sky with diamonds HA HA I'm good.

Well

Peace love harmony joy live for the future all is well and all a good night 

Xo Morgan 

See you soon?

Got written up today for being late.. I officially have a performance evaluation record. In a couple weeks, I'm scheduled to be reevaluated for this job. I'm terrified.

Om nom

Eating on the ship is one of those love hate, bitter sweet scenarios. There are dining areas called "messes" that serve buffet style meals pretty much every other hour. And of course there's 24 hour pizza, nachos, ice cream and other munchies available in the guest areas. Need I say more.

Food in the designated areas rock buuuuut we aren't allowed cutlery in our cabins.. Like da hell. So as great as the food is, and guys, it's GREAT, we only have access to it when we're dressed appropriately, have the time to commute and dine and the prime factor.. The energy. Oh my lord. 3 flights of stairs for a salad. Jakenncoofodbqlekhf. 

But then I discovered we have access to unlimited baby boxes of cereal. In other words, I found Jesus. I live by these boxes of puuuuure eatable gold.

Fruit loops for days yo

Ha

Keep it eazzzzzzy 

Morgan 

Morgan's cruise line safety tips

Fire on board?

Stop drop and roll

Man over board?

Stop drop and roll

Flood?

Stop drop and roll

Sinking ship?

Stop.. Drop and roll

Questions? Answered. In summary, an update. Cruising diaries.. ALL ABOARD

So I'm sitting here in a training session on board the carnival conquest, checking emails, posting pics, tweeting, answering questions on Instagram, Facebook, updating what feels like the ENTIRE WORLD of people and quite frankly.........no.

This blog is dedicated to my best friends, friends and you. 

Ha

What cruise? Carnival's conquest

Doing what? I'm a dancer singer in the Playlist Productions- Divas, The Brits, and Latin Nights

How long? 7 1/2 months. Until feb 9th

Where? It's Caribbean.. I visit places like Grand Caymen, Belize, Jamaica, Mexico.. Tbh I really don't know because I literally have not gotten off this ship in 11 days now.

How is it? Ok here we go..

Fun but stressful

Rewarding but testing

Overwhelming, emotional, both positive and negative

No regrets but ohhhhhhhhh my lord do I miss home

Lonely

Tired but enthused 

Depressing at times but at the end of the day, for the amount I'm making.. It's worth it 

Any more questions? Feel free to comment and ill direct you to a FAQ page on carnivals website :):):):) 

Life on board can't be put into words. Trying to explain would be like trying to explain high school to a 6 year (no offence) but unless you experience it, regardless of what you've been through, you literally won't be able to comprehend it. I couldn't and I still don't. 

To give you an idea..

I'm alone. I'm surrounded by a lot of people and water. That's it. The ship provides me food, a bed, work-money, entertainment and exercise. For those who are thinking shut up you're privileged let me tell you what I don't have. Then maybe you'll understand why my life can be so miserable at times. No:

Friends, family, pets, parks, fresh air, fresh produce, freedom of expression from the clothing you wear, to the things you say in guest areas, baths, falafel, for me- sleep, couches, candles, down time and stillness. I'm always moving. Always moving. Moving always. Literally, always, moving.. Back.. And forth.. Back and forth......... Back......

And forth.

Yup.

BUT FUN FOR ALL AND ALL FOR FUN RIGHT????????

If I wasn't getting paid, I'd already be in home asleep. Straight up. I've already had a number of panic attacks thinking about just how long I'm actually going to be here..

I'm missing school, my brother's Graduation, his first day in high school, my family's move to a new home, summer, school (not complaining) Halloween, my best friend's birthday, my birthday, CHRISTMAS, New Years, my dad's birthday, Easter, winter (absolutely not complaining), my dance studio (ok now I'm complaining) and more. 

Since I've been here I've realized.. I'm not really living. That's 7 1/2 months of life gone. Seems long.. Seems short..

Glass half empty or half full?

There are a lot of perks that I mentioned and the ship truly is incredible, if you're vacationing. Which I am not.

What I live here is I'm dancing a lot. I'm rehearsing, performing and watching performances. A dancer's dream come true. Minus the hot single male dancers everyone dreams of but even on the Carnival Dream you will not find one. But if you love gay male dancers then haaaaaaayyyy we've got some (8) !!!!! We have a lot of Phillipinos too.. If you're interested.. Like 400 to choose from.. Yeah..

I party a lot here. If I'm not drinking I'm rehearsing or workin out. There's a cast on board now that we will be replacing in two weeks. As you can imagine, the last 2 weeks of a contract is an expedition of cheap drinks, $1.50 mixed drinks for crew ps, and late mornings, now that the new cast, me, is here to assume their positions. I looooove spending time with them. They're a trip. Always having a good time, full of wisdom and alcohol. Lots of alcohol. $7 bottles of Pinot Grigio HOLLLLLA.

As an 18 year old, the youngest in the cast by 3 years, eldest is 34 and the average age is 25, I find myself alone more then often.. So I usually spending time in the gym. Within the first 5 days I lost 3 lbs.. Since then I've gained it back but have shrunk quite a bit.. Muscle does weigh more then fat. I'm pretty jacked. I'm also a lot more tan and my hair is blonding YEAH THAT A WORD

oh my lawwwwd I could go on for 11 days but ill stop

Consider this entry an update. Ill keep my posts interesting from here on out. 

I PROMISE

MAYBE

G

O

O

D

N

I

G

H

T

🚢🚢🚢🚢🚢🚢🚢🚢🚢🚢

xo

Morgan